Virginia M. Smith
1929-1987Virginia was born October 21, 1929 in Madison, Kansas, the second of four children to Rev. Marvin Allen, and his wife Effie. The Allen children were raised with good, traditional family values, with love and spiritual guidance, and discipline when necessary. And like most kids, Virginia pushed the envelope with regard to her parents' restrictions. She attended school in Emporia, and acquired the nickname "Ginny" from friends. At the tender age of sixteen, she met William B. Smith following his return from duty at the close of World War II, and the two were married soon after. They had three children, William JR, Robert, and Becky, and relocated to Wichita in 1959. The children married and ultimately gave them five grandchildren. Bill and Ginny enjoyed a close, loving relationship for 41 years until her death in 1987.
From the day my mother was married, her focus was directed to providing a good home for her family. She didn't have the opportunity to continue her education, and as a result, it appeared that she felt inadequate at times. I believe though, that she worked very hard to continually develop herself throughout her entire life. She managed a retail store for a number of years, supervised and worked well with people, and developed an excellent understanding of all aspects of business. She was very artistic, was a good writer, taught herself to play the piano and organ, dabbled with oil painting, and enjoyed creating and marketing reproduction dolls as a hobby. She was an impeccable homemaker, perhaps too much so. And, above all else, she was a loving wife and a wonderful mother and grandmother.
Today, I'm left with slightly fading, but precious memories of a very special, a very loving mother. I remember as an impressionable kid how much I was moved by my mother's beauty. As I grew older, I became more impressed with the person, her characteristics and qualities. There was a shyness and self-consciousness about her that she couldn't hide from others. She was sensitive and unobtrusive to those around her. She was the type of individual that would draw little attention to herself in a crowded room. She just wasn't particularly extroverted, and as a result, only a few people really got to know her. I don't believe, however, that she would have wanted it any other way. My mother was very comfortable and happy within her circle of family and friends. She was selfless, and extremely accommodating to others. She was softhearted, and caring. And again, to our benefit, her family's well being and happiness was more important to her than anything else.
My mother had a striking sense of humor and an unforgettable laugh that all of us who were close to her enjoyed. I have memories of too many occasions as a self-indulgent teenager of doing something that upset her. Invariably, I could clown around with her and instantly change her demeanor. It was easy to make her laugh, a quality that I truly loved about her.
It may be descriptive to also mention that my mother had a genuine passion for Wichita State University basketball, enjoyed attending games or listening to radio broadcasts, and did so religiously. She kept accurate, detailed statistics during each game, and could give you insights that you couldn't get from the box scores in the newspaper. And she would become so excited watching the games that she, to some degree, became the attraction to those around her. It was just a pleasure to be around her, and I believe others who knew her well felt the same way. Her very nature seemed to bring a smile to others.
I remember my last conversation with her, holding her hand, telling her how much I wished I was lying in that bed rather than she. And this, I believe, is a measure of one's life, the extent with which we're loved by others. I miss you Mom. You touched us with your presence, and we've come to realize the extent of your touch through your absence. Although I wish I had more of your qualities, I'm proud and grateful for what you passed on to me. There's not a day that goes by that I don't think of you.
From: karen - Sunday, April 13, 2003 at 7:00:43 AM CST
I guess I don't know exactly what to write. I lost my mother to emphysema 18months ago when I was 20yrs old. She lost her breath at home alone and that is where she was found, we didn't have time to say goodbye to her. I miss her terribly. I know how it feels to lose someone from this and it is terrible to watch. It's hard to live without a mother aswell. But the main thing is all our lost ones are resting now and not suffering. I don't know if I can leave my tribute page for my mother here, and if I can't I'm sorry. www.geocities.com/weloveumum Take Care.
From: Wanda - Sunday, July 28, 2002 at 4:00:32 PM CST
My sister was my idol, from my childhood days throughout my life. I watched her and loved her. I listened to her and loved her. I laughed with her and loved her. The times I spent with her are precious memories, and when I think of them, my heart is so filled with love for her. Our talks, whether it was sitting and talking over a cup of coffee, sitting in her porch swing reminiscing, or visiting and receiving advice on the phone, they were and are a very special part of my life. A special childhood memory was when I was 6 years old. Ginny sat me on the dining room table and fixed my hair so pretty, and just for fun, she fashioned me up with make-up. I felt like a queen. Of course, I had to wash it all off, but she made me feel so special to her. She had a way about her that made you feel special, and as her sister, I was so proud of her. I miss her still, but I thank God for the years we all had with her to share her love. She will always have that special place in my heart. I love and miss you, Ginny.
From: Becky - Friday, June 08, 2001 at 4:27:11 PM CST
The tribute my brother wrote for our mother is, to say the least, eloquent, therefore very difficult for me to follow.
He has accurately described her demeanor and her life. There is very little I can add, except that she was my best friend, my confidant and my teacher. She taught me love, courage, hope, and sensitivity. She was always there for me and saw me through very difficult times.
I often remember when she and I would spend hours talking and laughing. Many times still, I find myself wishing I could pick up the phone to share some piece of good news, or to ask for her advice.
Like my brother, I regret not being more supportive of her when she became so ill. I suppose a child never really thinks about their parents dying at such a young age. I did not even consider the possibility that her illness would take her life. I remember times when I felt angry with her for not fighting harder to get better. I wish to God I had been a better daughter near the end of her life and I pray that she knows how much I loved her and still do.
I am very grateful for my time with her. I know that I am a better person for it.
I miss you mom!